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Rabu, 09 Mei 2012

The Seven Sins of a Conversation




By Dorothea Hendriks


Are you guilty of practicing one of the 7 sins of small talk? They are so easy to do, seem so unimportant, but whenever we put them into action, we immediately place a damper on the talking relationship that we have with the other person. So, what are the 7 Sins of Small Talk ?

1. Interrupting the individual that is speaking.

Interrupting someone in mid-sentence, not only derails the other person's line of thought it can make it troublesome for them to continue past the interruption.

2. Hogging the 'small talk ' platform.

Though we can have riveting talks with ourselves, monopolizing the conversation shows no effort, on our part, to engage the other person. Building a significant speaking relationship needs give and take between you and the other person.

3. Taking the other person's experience.

Sometimes, somebody will grab a talking partner's experience, and interject their own story. A chum of mine was asked about her current hiking trip. She had hardly started her story when the other person snapped the words 'hiking trip ' out of her mouth and then, went on to upstage her by filling in details about his personal hiking experiences.

4. Questioning your speaking partner.

While asking questions inspire dialogue, asking too many questions one after the other in fast succession, can put your talking partner on the defence. If they feel interrogated, they may doubtless leave you sooner, rather than later on.

5. Providing one word answers.

Ever tried speaking with someone who responds with just a word? How's the new job? Fine. What did you have for lunch? Tuna. Where did you go for lunch? Tim's. While there isn't anything wrong with the occasional one word, or very short response, neither one makes a contribution to finding commonly held ground on which to build a speaking relationship.

6. Speaking with food in your mouth.

When an individual asks us a question and we have food in our mouth, we can recognize the questioner with a mild motion of our hand meaning that we have something in our mouth. Finish our gnawing; swallow and then talk.

7. Disagreeing or debating?.

While many of us like oral sparring, it's best left for when we must fight hostile takeovers, not when we are trying to engage in 'agreeable ' chit-chat.

Avoid these lethal seven sins of small talk and you will soon develop a rep for being a brilliant conversationalist!




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Thank's for you